Congratulations! You’ve been invited to -or, worse, roped into hosting—a BBQ. You may think it’s just a matter of throwing meat on fire and telling everyone to “bring a chair,” but no, my friends. Florida BBQs are a delicate ecosystem, and one misstep can haunt you from Yulee to Ybor.
Let’s talk etiquette, the “Those Florida Guys” way.
If You’re the Host: Rule with a Spatula, Not an Iron Fist
What to Cook (and What NOT to Cook)
- Do: Offer a meaty medley -ribs, burgers, sausage, chicken thighs, maybe brisket if you hate free time. Bonus points for a smoked chuck roast. Dust everything with Those Florida Guys rubs, naturally.
- Don’t: Cook only tofu dogs unless you want guests “suddenly remembering” their cousin’s dog’s birthday party.
- Pro Tip: At least one thing needs to look burnt. It reassures people it’s actually a cookout.
Veggies & Sides
- Grilled corn: Acceptable. Potato salad: Required by law.
- If you have a signature dish (like “Grandma’s World Famous Mac & Cheese”), serve it. If it’s not good, serve it anyway and call it “rustic.”
- Have at least one salad for appearances but keep it far from the meat. If it touches, someone’s uncle will throw a fit.
Beverage Lineup
- Beer: Required. The colder and cheaper, the better.
- Seltzers: For people who say things like “beach bod.”
- Sweet tea: Iced enough to survive August and sweet enough to require an insulin shot.
- Water: Sure, but you’ll still have to remind Cousin Phil that beer is not hydration.
- Cocktail bar: Think SPF 7 Bloody Breeze, Peach Therapy Smash, or anything with an umbrella. If it’s over 90°F (so, always), keep the drinks frozen or risk mass mutiny.
Dress Code: Summer Casual…But Not Like That
- Shorts? Mandatory. Jorts? Only if you commit fully (mullet included).
- Tank tops: Acceptable but must have at least one BBQ stain. Hawaiian shirts score style points.
- Shoes: Flip-flops, Crocs, or barefoot—just check for rogue skewers.
- Apron: “Kiss the Cook” required if you’re handling meat. Optional for everyone else.
Host Commandments
- Start the music before the first guest arrives. Jimmy Buffett is always the correct answer.
- Accept that at least two people will bring the same Publix fruit tray. Smile -fruit is expensive. Stack them.
- Have enough chairs. No one wants to stand for three hours except Larry, who “likes to hover” by the smoker.
If You’re a Guest: Don’t Be That Guy
What Sides to Bring
- Potato salad (but not if you’re feuding with Aunt Patty—she’s the potato salad queen and WILL taste-test).
- Baked beans: Bonus if homemade, double-bonus if they include bacon.
- Chips and dip: You can never have too much, unless you bring only Tostitos Scoops and no dip.
- Desserts: Key lime pie (always approved), brownies, or a tray of grocery store cookies you pass off as homemade. (We see you, Gary.)
- Don’t: Bring a kale salad unless you want to leave with the same bowl. Seriously, who hurt you?
What Not to Bring
- Your untrained dog (or child) unless they’re leash-trained and don’t bark at meat.
- Your “famous” microwaved corn casserole. We know. We’ve tasted it.
- Attitude. There is plenty of food, drinks, and laughs to go around -leave it at the door.
Beverages: Sharing Is Caring
- If the invite says BYOB, don’t show up with a single Smirnoff Ice “for yourself.”
- Bring a six-pack plus a little something for the host. Bonus if you bring something local and weird.
- If you want to impress, make a batch cocktail with Those Florida Guys rub on the rim.
How to Behave
- Offer to help, but don’t “accidentally” take over the grill. There can only be one Pit Boss.
- Don’t complain about smoke, heat, bugs, or Florida humidity. We all signed up for this.
- Compliment the food. If it’s overcooked, say it’s “smoky.” If it’s raw, call it “sushi-style.”
Character Lineup: Who You’ll Meet at Every Florida BBQ
- The Grill Sergeant: Won’t let you peek under the lid but will talk for an hour about the “smoke ring.”
- The Sideshow Bartender: Invents new drinks with every refill. Sometimes remembers the ice.
- Publix Pete: Arrives with three bags of store-bought sides and a bottle of rosé.
- Uncle Ed: Eats three plates, falls asleep in a lawn chair by 4 p.m., wakes up for dessert.
- The “Hot Sauce Hero”: Brings a collection of 17 bottles and insists everyone tries “Da Butt Bomb.” Don’t try it. Just don’t.
Closing Arguments (and Dessert)
BBQ etiquette is simple: bring food, bring fun, and bring a sense of humor. If you forget your manners, at least bring extra napkins and a backup shirt. And if you really want to win hearts, slip a little Those Florida Guys rub on your dish and tell everyone it’s “a Florida thing.”
Now, go forth and grill. Just please, for the love of brisket, don’t double-dip and don’t wear white.