Meat the Party: A Smoky Guide to Feeding the Masses with Flavor and Finesse

A big one. Maybe it’s a backyard bash, a beachside BBQ, or just an excuse to crank up the smoker and make your neighbors regret their hot dog choices. Either way, you’re staring at a smoker, a shopping list, and a guest list longer than a Florida summer. And the big question hits you:

“How much meat do I need?”

Closely followed by:

“How long is this going to take?”

And then:

“How many beers until this is all done?”

But Finally:

“Can I get away with doing this in flip-flops and board shorts?”

(Spoiler alert: Yes. Flip-flops are encouraged.)

We’ve broken down the most popular meats to smoke for a crowd, how much to buy, how long to smoke ‘em at 200–250°F, and which of Those Florida Guys rubs will make you look like a pitmaster wizard who fell off a pontoon boat and landed in flavor heaven. Quantities and time will vary based on how hungry folks are and the specific weights and cooker sizes, but this will get you in the ballpark.

Pork Ribs (a.k.a. the crowd pleaser)

• Time: 5–6 hours
• Serving Size: ½ rack per person (about 4–6 ribs)
• Meat Math: 1 rack feeds 2 people comfortably
• Pro Tip: Buy a few extra racks. People say they’re “watching their figure” until the ribs hit the table.

Rub It Right: Use Gulf BBQ for a tangy-sweet Florida finish with just enough smoky sass to say “I came to party, not to apologize.”

Brisket (the main event)

• Time: 12–18 hours (yes, you read that right – start the night before and cancel your alarm clock)
• Serving Size: ½ pound per person (¼ lb. lean, ¼ lb. moist)
• Meat Math: A 12 lb. brisket (raw) yields about 6–7 lbs. cooked, which feeds 12–14 guests

Rub It Right: Start with All Purp for sweet heat and ginger-cayenne charisma, then finish with Steak Shake to get that rustic, herby crust that whispers, “Texas who?”

Pork Butt (pulled pork for the people)

• Time: 10–12 hours
• Serving Size: ⅓ to ½ pound per person
• Meat Math: A 10 lb. pork butt yields ~6 lbs. of pulled pork = feeds 12–15 folks

Rub It Right: You can’t go wrong with Errthang – garlic, onion, orange peel and smoked salt come together like a beach bonfire and a six-pack.

Beef Ribs (brontosaurus style)

• Time: 6–8 hours
• Serving Size: 1–2 ribs per person (these are huge)
• Meat Math: 1 rack = 3–4 people
• Warning: May cause guests to beat their chest and shout “MEAT!” like cavemen. This is normal and a sign that they have accepted you into their tribe.

Rub It Right: Go bold with Sunburn – citrus habanero heat that’s got bite but won’t ruin tomorrow. It’s beefy, fiery, and Florida as hell.

Smoked Chicken (whole, halves, or quarters)

• Time: 2.5–4 hours depending on cut
• Serving Size: ¼ chicken per person
• Meat Math: 1 whole chicken feeds 4

Rub It Right: Hit it with Fin & Fowl – lime, vinegar, and chipotle. Light, bright, and zippy enough to make you forget you’re eating chicken and not winning a luau.

Smoked Chuck Roast (the undercover agent of BBQ)

• Time: 6–8 hours
• Serving Size: ½ pound per person
• Meat Math: A 3–4 lb. chuck roast will comfortably feed 6–8 people

Chuck roast is like that guy at the party who shows up in cargo shorts and flip-flops, drinks light beer, and still manages to out-grill the guy with the monogrammed apron. It’s rich, beefy, tender when done right—and a whole lot faster than a full brisket.

Rub It Right: Pair Steak Shake for rustic depth and a briny bite that gets along great with chuck’s beefy attitude. Add a little All Purp if you’re feelin’ spicy-sweet and want to flirt with caramelized bark glory.

Pro Tip: Smoke it low and slow to 165°F, then throw it in pan of sliced onions and beef broth, cover then throw back on the smoker until its 205°F and pull apart perfect!

How Much Food Do I Really Need?

Here’s a quick cheat sheet to avoid that “Oh no, we ran out of meat” nightmare:

Final Tips from the Dockside Pit

• Start Early:
• Meat doesn’t care about your social schedule. You’re on the clock -cook like it.
• Low and slow is the way, but don’t be afraid to up the heat as-needed.
• Build in a rest time of 30–60 minutes after cooking. 3-4 hours is better, especially for beef.
• Serve Sides that Don’t Fight for Fridge Space:
• Coleslaw, cornbread, watermelon slices, baked beans, and grilled pineapple.
• Better yet, have your guests bring sides -honestly, who doesn’t bring a side to the BBQ?
• Don’t Forget the Sauce:
• Don’t be such a purist that you cant let people enjoy BBQ on their terms
• Set out a selection of curated sauces (even better if they are homemade) and enjoy the smiles on faces
• (And yes, we’re working on some bottled magic behind the scenes…)
• Be a lot cooler if you did:
• If the meat is done before your party, wrap it up tight in foil or butcher paper, then wrap it in a towel, and toss that fella in the cooler (not the one with the beer, that would be bad)
• The meat needs time to rest and as long as the temp doesn’t drop below 140°F, your well inside the danger zone of serving food.
• It will take quite a long time for something at 200°F to come down below 140°F, so relax and focus on the rest of your cook and making another rum drink!

Feeding a crowd with smoked meat is part math, part art, and mostly just an excuse to smell like mesquite all day and drink bourbon before 5pm. But do it right—with a cooler full of beer, some SPF, and a handful of Those Florida Guys rubs—and you’ll turn your backyard into a beachside smokehouse.

“Florida Flavors. Florida Vibes. Flip-flops strongly encouraged.”